No more sleeping till noon, midday movies, afternoon naps, and most importantly, interviews.

I finally got the job offer, sort of. I had been told in my final interview that this job would be temp to perm. I figured that was no big deal. I've never done temp to perm before, but I figured you basically were hired, on a trial basis for a few months, and then if they liked you, they kept you. Well, it's not exactly like that. At least not in this case. I don't get a formal offer until after this "trial" period. And until then, I'm making an hourly rate that is really not great at all, so, until this trial period is over I'm still on somewhat of a spending freeze.

I'll be working at a well known investment company as the executive assistant in the private equity group. The job duties are very similar to my last job, however the environment is different. I'll be in a quiet office, instead of a hectic trading floor. I'll be covering three men, instead of reporting to one Global Head (John) and covering his 30 +/- direct reports. I'm a little sad to be leaving the trading floor environment. I had never experienced anything like it. There were about 350 on the floor, people shouting all the time, random things happening when days were slow (like push up contests for upwards of $500) and just being around so many eccentric characters and such great guys. However, I will not miss working for such a large company where I felt like a number. In my first interview at this hedge fund the girl I met with had worked at a large Wall Street bank before this company as well. She said Wall Street is where you do your undergrad, and a hedge fund is where you go for your MBA. I love that. I'm really looking forward to being in an environment where I feel like I'm someone, and get to know more people. I'm also excited to have some work space, and some privacy. It's really hard to work when you have someone sitting next to you on each side, less than two feet away. Literally, we measured one time and there were like 20 inches between us. I can't tell you how many times drinks were spilled. And everyone pretty much knew the business of those sitting near them.

One of the things I'm most excited about, is the office is on the 41st floor, three blocks south of Central Park. There is an amazing view of the park I could never get sick of. Also, the real perk, it's only a mile from home so I'll walk to work every day! I know what you're thinking, "Yeah right, that's what you say now," but honestly where it's located in relation to my apartment it would make more sense to walk or take a cab than to take the subway. I'd only take the subway one stop, and then still have some walking ahead of me. By the time I did that, I really wouldn't be saving myself any time. And it would be way too pricey to take cabs every day (although, I know I will occasionally when the weather's really bad.) I can't even express how excited I am to forego the monthly subway card and expense of $104/month (I'll just pay-per-ride for when I do take the subway on occasion.) And, really, can you imagine a better commute to work than walking 25 minutes most of it through Central Park? I don't think one exists.

Anyway, thank you all so much for your supportive comments and prayers. Hopefully I will be a good match for the position and won't have to temp for too long.

Gaga oh lala!

Clear back in May Reagan and I bought tickets to see Lady Gaga. Feb 2011 seemed soooo far away. I usually never plan anything that far in advance. I think all my international trips usually have less than two months prep time because I just get too impatient to plan that far out. However, as time does, it flew, and before we knew it we were talking about what we were going to wear for the concert. We both had a bit of sparkle, but didn't go too crazy (Reagan had to work and I'm just not that creative.) There were, however, some seriously sweet costumes. We saw an old lady in head to toe silver sparkles, lots of crazy wigs, a bird's nest on a guy's head, and 12 inch platforms (and some very impressive walking in them.)

A lot of people like to hate on Gaga because she's so weird. I think maybe people think she's just trying to get attention or something, I don't know. Apparently she told Anderson Cooper she dresses the way she does because it takes the focus away from her personal life. (It's true, do you ever hear any dating rumors about her? Or see any "Stars, they're just like us!" photos of her in Us Weekly?) Regardless, yes, she is a total freak, but I still love her. I love her music and I love love love her message. Both Reagan and I agreed we felt so uplifted and good about ourselves after leaving the concert. She promotes loving yourself, not letting anyone making you feel bad about yourself, and never being ashamed of yourself, even if you are different. She had a lot of crowd interaction, which I love. I loved hearing stories about her growing up in the city, taking the subway, going to the Tisch School of Arts at NYU, and her dreams of becoming a star. She was such a great entertainer. She sang all her hits, danced her hiney off in super tall heels all night, played the piano (I love when singers can play an instrument) and even played the guitar with her stiletto heel. So cool.

One of my favorite things about Gaga is how much she loves her fans and how appreciative she is to them. I've never been to a concert where the artist expressed so much sincere gratitude to his or her fans. She seems to really truly love her fans and and appreciate them.

Reags and I had such a blast, singing and dancing the whole night. I am so so happy we were able to get these tickets (even though our seats were terrible.) We still had the best time.

My friend Tyson had an amazing view from where he was standing. I stole this picture from him.

Reags and Rae.

PS Reagan wrote a way better recap of the concert on her blob.

Homesick for Australia.

Watching The Amazing Race tonight gave me series homesick feelings for Australia. I would go back in a second. I decided to go through my photos and upload a few of my favorites. Turns out, when you take 723 photos on a trip (actually, that's not counting the ones I deleted) you can never have "just a few" favorites. This was the trip of a life time. Sigh...

In Brisbane (straight off the 15 hour flight, hence looking like death.)

At the Australia Zoo.

Maheno Shipwreck on Fraser Island.

Lake McKenzie. Still can't believe that's all rain water.

Sailing the Whitsunday Islands.

Whitehaven Beach. Most beautiful place I've ever seen.

Just before my camel ride in the Outback.

Outback sunset.

Walking the 9km around Uluru.

Driving the Great Ocean Road.

The Twelve Apostles.

In Melbourne.

At the Sydney Aquarium.

Walking the Sydney Harbour Bridge with Karen and Brooke.

A couple things I miss:

This girl and my long hair.

A better day

I wanted to get a new post up because I feel like my last post was so whiny. I feel guilty complaining when I have such a blessed and charmed life. No matter how much I tried to spoil myself, and how positive I told myself to be, I just couldn't get out of a funk. For some reason I've found myself to be particularly emotional lately and yesterday was no exception. Last week my dad was in town and over dinner we were discussing the good news I'd just gotten (that I was supposed to be getting this job offer....I'd found out literally right before he picked me up) and during this conversation discussed how I most likely will never work for John again, and also all the other MDs (managing directors) who worked under John, who I absolutely love, who all told me they'd give me stellar recommendations. I'll never adequately be able to describe my love for these men. They were so sweet to me, and took such good care of me. They were like big brothers in the way they constantly harassed me and were always digging around in my love life. They were so generous when it came to Christmas time, or any other random time when they just felt like buying me lunch. They really were my first family in New York and no matter how many jobs I have, or how many people I meet, that will never be replaced. As I was just briefly telling my dad about the nice texts I'd received from some of them I couldn't help but totally choke up. Then when we started discussing potentially working for John again, I mentioned how I just always felt like our time was over, and, once again, here came the water works. I've always been a pretty emotional person but lately it's been out of control. It's bizarre and there's really no explanation for it.

Anways, this was meant to be a brief post but I get rambling and always manage to turn these into novels.

I have some cousins that are pretty serious readers. Shellie reviewed Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close here, Trish reviewed it here, and Brooke reviewed it here. I know Elise is toying with reading it, and I recently heard it's being made into a movie. I've been hearing about this book for years, so on Sunday night I downloaded it to my kindle and have been loving it. Don't expect me to be finished in a week because I'm a terribly slow reader, but I'm excited to be back into a good book. I haven't read anything that I really loved for a while, so I'm excited about this book.

So far here's a couple of my favorite quotes:

What about little microphones? What if everyone swallowed them, and they played the sounds of our hearts through little speakers, which could be in the pouches of our overalls?...except that the place in the hospital where babies are born would sound like a crystal chandelier in a houseboat, because the babies wouldn't have had time to match up their heartbeats yet. And at the finish line at the end of the New York City Marathon it would sound like a war.

In bed that night I invented a special drain that would be underneath every pillow in New York, and would connect to the reservoir. Whenever people cried themselves to sleep, the tears would all go to the same place, and in the morning the weatherman could report if the water level of the Reservoir of Tears had gone up or down, and you could know if New York was in heavy boots.

I especially loved this second quote, as anyone who knows me knows how much I love the Jackie O. Reservoir. It is one of my absolute favorite spots in the city, and one of my favorite forms of therapy.

Valentine's Day for the single and unemployed

8:29am (not pictured) Woken up (briefly) by a "Happy v day" text from my old boss. Thoughtful. Can't you pleeeeease get a job so I can work for you again??

10:39am Finally rolling out of bed. (No interviews today.)

10:46am Texting with Brad. Always good for a laugh.

10:57am Breakfast! I love Grapenuts.

11:57am Had to hop in a cab because my subway decided to change routs right before my stop. I had a 12pm appointment. I was cutting it close.

2:20pm Rose petals lined the halls and stairs of the spa. The winter has been destroying my skin so I decided to treat myself to a Valentine's Day facial.

2:36pm Mmmmmm rice pudding...

3:07pm Back on the subway, in cognito, thanks to nasty post spa greaser look.

3:31pm Finally! After living near Central Park West for six months I finally spot a celeb just strolling along. Hello Jeffrey Tambor, I loved you as Pop Pop in Arrested Development. Please let there be a movie? (PS He is very thin.)

4:08pm (not pictured) Received the following text from my quasi-Valentine: R we still on for tonight or do u want to maybe hang out another night this week instead? My response: Sounds like that might be better for you... This initiated a phone call from him, and then an awkward conversation with curt responses from me. Turns out there's "too much pressure" on Valentine's (he asked me last week, mind you, not the other way around) and I made it very clear that considering the newness of our.....thing.......there was no pressure and we could do something very casual.

4:12pm Treated myself to some Trader Joe's roses (and a DDP I'd been craving for hours) after reading about Elise's sunflowers lasting three weeks.

4:37pm (not pictured) Received a phone call from old boss who informs me he was called to discuss my time working for him, from potential future employer. (Yes! Yes! Yes! Best news all day.)

6:05pm While in shower, the power goes out. I'd just started sudsing up the shampoo. Proceeded to shower in the pitch black. I'm talking, hold your hand in front of your face and can't see it, pitch black. It was.....creepy. Especially because Courtnie was on her way over and I'd left my door unlocked in case she got there before I finished showering. Every scary movie I'd ever seen came into my head. Thoughts of every exboyfriend flooded through my mind, as I wondered if there was anyone that wanted to kill me. I really creeped myself out, and decided to skip the shave, for safety's purpose, as well as hurrying the freak up to get out of the creepy dark shower.

7:45pm Dinner at Harry's with Courtnie. Just what I needed. More soda and delicious mexican food. Thank you.

8:33pm Cupcakes and Bachelor watching with some of my favorite ladies. I'm not usually a Bach watcher (more like a hater) however, when it's shared with these girls it's so so fun.

11:16pm Came home to a Valentine from Mom and Dad, and another from my Huddy Buddy. Have you seen a cuter Valentine? This was the best part of my day.

This breakdown is a takeoff from a great idea Elise read about here. Basically, on the 10th of each month, take a photo an hour, for ten consecutive hours. I think this is so cute and fun. Since I just missed it this month, I decided to do it for Valentine's Day (sorta.)

As I typed about my day I can't help but think to myself, "Wow, what a great day! (Minus that whole date ditching thing...)" But, for whatever reason, today was a really rough day. I think it's mostly because I've been waiting on a job offer that was supposedly coming mid-week last week. Every day it was "tomorrow" and then tomorrow would come and it was, once again, "tomorrow." I sort of hate talking about it because I feel like I'll jinx myself, plus, once it's out there everyone always wants to ask, "Did it happen? Did you hear anything?" And it sort of sucks to be like, "Yeah......no, haven't heard anything. Still interviewing." (Seriously though, don't ask. I promise to let everyone know when I have a job. Thanks for your concern.) Have I mentioned I'm siiiiiiiick of interviewing? So sick of it. And now that I'm supposedly getting this offer I'm really over it. So all day I was feeling really frustrated because I keep expecting to get the call, but no dice. I don't know which is worse, waiting for a guy to call or waiting for the headhunter to call with the offer. Every time my phone buzzes I jump, and every time I'm disappointed. This is why, when I found out they're checking my references, I was so so happy.

I guess you could say the second half of my day was definitely better than the first. It was just one of those days. And I know, I was even sick of being around myself. I was walking down the street, enjoying what was almost like a spring day (50 degrees!) but just feeling so sorry for myself. I kept telling myself to snap out of it, that I have it SOOOOO great and when I think about the problems so many of my loved ones are facing, I feel like the most ungrateful person ever. But...... it was just one of those days that I couldn't shake the blues. At the end of the day, it still sort of sucks to come home and go to bed alone. All day I sort of felt forgotten to everyone but my former employer. And I know, I KNOW I'm being ridiculous. Like I said, it was just one of those days where my brain can't get my emotions in order. This is why, coming home to two sweet valentines really really made my day. I should also mention, my mom, dad and brothers did call later, which was mucho appreciated, whether someone put the bug in their ear or not. I appreciated the gesture.

Okay, tomorrow's another day. I promise to make it a better day. I have an interview (sigh....) and then am going to boxing in the evening. I love love love boxing.

Happy Valentine's Day. Hope you all had a good day and a better attitude than me.

Four years ago today...

JFK

Four years ago *today I left my parents' home early in the morning to catch a flight to my new home in NYC. I would be sharing a bedroom in an apartment in Harlem, which I'd only seen in photos. It's was a fifth floor walk up. I didn't know who my roommates were, or really very many people in the city for that matter. (Three, to be exact.) I thought the closer the location to Times Square, the better. I had about $1000 to my name. My monthly rent was $625, and I still had a car payment since I hadn't been able to sell my car back home. I planned on getting an entry level job in sales. After the sun went down and it became increasingly more cold (this was February, after all) I texted my roommate while she was in class to ask her how to turn the heat on. Her response? "Sadly, it is on." I was preparing to go on an interview the next day for what I later found out was a job as a mystery shopper. It was extremely awkward, and I told the guy, mid-meeting, that this just wasn't for me and got up and left. I spent most evenings exploring the city with my roommate Chelsie, or hanging out with a guy I had a long time thing for, and had no clue how to play the game. I was 23 and basically clueless. I spent many lunches and dinners at Giovanni's (or, Jerry's, to me and Chels) because Jerry and Mario were extremely friendly, and I could get a big slice and soda for $3. Not to mention, they frequently threw in a free piece of carrot cake. Once I changed directions and started looking for a job being an assistant I took the first offer I got.

Three years ago today I was living in the financial district in a high rise building, sharing an amazing apartment with three roommates, and a bedroom with one. I was dating someone who, even though I didn't realize it quite yet, I was crazy in love with. I felt like I'd officially made it in the city. I loved my job. (Was so lucky that the first offer I'd received ended up being the perfect job.) I had an amazing boss. I felt comfortable getting around the city on the subways without having to consult a map. I loved my ward. Things were good.

Two years ago today is a bit of a blur. This time of my life was incredibly tough and I was facing challenges more difficult than I'd ever experienced (and it got worse before it got better.) I still had the same job, and same amazing boss, thankfully, because he was so good to me when I was such a mess. I was still living in the financial district, but in a shoebox apartment with two other roommates. I gave up the amazing apartment two blocks away so I could get into a place in which I'd have my own room. There were some pretty serious problems in my family life, and I was in pieces over my best friend, the person I thought I was going to marry. I never knew I was capable of feeling so much love and hate and hurt, all directed at one person. I contemplated at times quitting my job, leaving New York, and just making some sort of change. (The big hair cut didn't quite satisfy that need.) I felt depressed and empty and lost. If it wasn't for my good friends, and a loving Heavenly Father, I never would have made it.

A year ago today I'd moved back to the amazing apartment in the financial district. Still had three roommates, but I had my own room. I was paying double the rent of my first apartment, but I didn't care. It was worth it. After dragging on for almost another year, I was just beginning to get over the relationship that still occasionally feels like it defines my life as "before him" and "after him." From this point on, things really started looking up, for a while. Still at the same job, still had the amazing boss, still loving the ward and my life, but feeling a little restless and like I needed a change of scenery. I felt, more than ever, that I needed my own space and independence. I was on my way to getting my life back together after having my world rocked too many times the year before. I was feeling good.

Today, I'm no longer employed. I'm no longer in love. I'm no longer torn to shreds over that love. I'm no longer living in the financial district. I no longer have roommates. I'm once again job hunting in the brutal winter, but I'm much more seasoned this time around. I've got experience. I've got money in the bank. I've got snow boots. I've got a coat that keeps me warm when it dips below 30 degrees. I've got more confidence. I've lost the naivete I had as a new girl in the city. I know what a want, instead of wanting almost any job that paid the bills. I've nailed the coffin shut, as much as possible without finding new love, in regards to my former love. I've learned a few lessons in dating, and even though I sometimes make the same mistakes, I don't make them over and over and over for months and months and months. Despite all the pain, I've taken such amazing lessons and become a better person from my past relationship. I have my own tiny studio on the Upper West Side which I love, in a location that almost can't be beat. I'm more comfortable being alone than ever, and in fact, not only am okay with it, but enjoy it, and sometimes prefer it. All that being said, I am far from having it all together. I have a lot of the same problems, but time and experience has taught me ways to better cope and recover. I'm more okay being me than I ever have been. I have a lot of questions about some pretty important things in life, and am working on figuring them out. As someone who's officially in their late 20s, I couldn't agree more that your 20s are for traveling and making mistakes.

I still love New York, maybe more than ever. I'll never have that new, giddy happiness I had for the first few months I moved here. But it's a more developed and mature love. A deep love. My dear friend Jane once told me, "Happiness isn't being giddy. Happiness is feeling joy and being content." This is my home. I can't imagine leaving or living anywhere else. Despite my darkest times when I craved a change, I don't have the "love/hate" relationship with New York so many of my friends talk about. It is love/love.

Thank you, New York. I love you.

*This was posted after midnight, so it's not exactly "today." I moved to New York February 6, 2007.

Paris has ruined me

Ever since my trip I can't stop thinking about macarons. Vanilla, in particular. I don't even want to admit how many I've eaten this week, thanks to Gina informing me they sell them at Trader Joe's. They are my new favorite treat. Ridiculously delicious.

An international evening

Last night we saw Biutiful and I loved it. I'm sort of of the opinion that Jarvier Bardem can do no wrong. I will warn you, it's lengthy, and heavy. It's 2 1/2 hours long and all in subtitles. I wouldn't say everyone would love it, but I definitely did. I'm glad we saw a 6:45pm movie though, because we didn't get out until 9:30. I have a really tough time staying awake in any movie but I only got sleepy once.

Next we headed to a restaurant in my hood that I can't remember the name of, but it was middle eastern food. I know, right? Who'da thunk? And guess what? I loved it. Maybe I just loved what we ordered, but it was delish.

I feel so ethnic.

Have you seen the latest Piper Jane video?

I just watched it and cried and cried. I love this little girl so much, even though I've only met her once. Part of the reason I love this video is to see Piper walking so well, and part of it is because of the pure love you can feel between Reagan and Piper. It's hard not to just watch Piper the whole time, but watch Reagan. Such a pure, mama love beaming from her face.

Thanks so much for always sharing Piper with us Reags.

Check out the video here.

Meet Spencer James Hope

Arrived Monday January 24, 2011 at 11:45am

Nine pounds even.

Everyone is doing great. I can't wait to go up to New Hampshire to meet the little guy. I'm now a proud aunty six times. :)

Me and Mikey

Mikey Perkey headed out to the Big D for a new job last week. I'm so sad. I'll definitely be out to visit. I miss you Mikey!

My block last Thursday

Did you hear about our record snow fall for the month? I am so happy I don't own a car to dig out.

The laundry guy: an update

Sooooooo I took your advice and went out with the guy from my building. Ultimately, I figured, why not? And actually, I really wanted to ask him what was up with the laundry.

We met up last night at a bar around the corner and chatted for an hour and a half. I had a great time. He's a really cool guy, and I mustered up the courage to mention my unmentionables. His response? Shock and embarrassment. Not because I'd brought it up, but because it wasn't him, and he was super embarrassed that for a couple weeks I thought it was him. He seemed pretty genuine, and I don't know why he'd lie about it since obviously I was willing to overlook it and go out with him. We had a really good laugh about it and agreed we were both glad I brought it up so we could clear things up.

Now, a detail I left out of the last post (I know, how is it possible I left out any details with the length of the post?) The day before I'd gotten the note, I'd been telling Maria about what had happened. Then, since I got the note the very next day, I texted Maria, and here's our conversation:

January 17

R: Ummmmmmm, remember that story I told you last night? I was just walking through my lobby and the doorman said he had an envelope for me...

M: Shut the hell up!!! Tell me!!

R: This was in it. (Insert photo of the note.)

M: OMG! Call me if you can.

R: I'm just getting into a movie. Will call you after.

M: Okay, that is crazy and funny at the same time. "Dude, London was cool, but why did you touch my laundry?"

R: Right? You know what is also crazy? I'm on a completely empty row and a woman just sat RIGHT next to me. Awkward... I don't think I could talk to him without asking....Okay, movie's starting. So much to discuss.

M: Totally. Enjoy your movie knowing I'm googling laundry guy.

R: Haha. Do it.

M: He better not be the magician with the same name.

R: Oh my gosh I hope so. He told me he's an ambulance chaser. Maybe he's lying...maybe he's a panty rifling magician who owns mini ponies!!!!!!!!!! Augh!!!!!!

(My aversion to miniature ponies is another story for another day.)

M: I'm crying right now.

R: Haha. Talk to you soon.

So I didn't think twice about the whole magician thing. I figured, another guy with the same name. Whatever. Then, once I agreed to go out with him obviously I did my homework via google. Waaaaaait a miiiinuuuuuuute.........he IS a magician!!!!! WHAT?! I couldn't help but laugh and think it just made the whole story even better.

So, now back to last night. After we cleared up the laundry situation I admitted, "I have another confession........I'd told my girlfriend about the laundry, and then when you left me the note I told her about it. She googled you...." He got a little grin on his face like he knew what was coming. I had initially planned on trying to get it out of him, ya know, "What do you do when you're not in court....what are your hobbies...blah blah blah" but I get a little impatient and just would rather shoot straight.

I'll admit, I think magic is sort of cool. When I was in high school some of our family friends were staying with us and their son was into magic. He and I talked about it for hours and he showed me all sorts of tricks.

Anyway, so we talked about it for a while. He's definitely aware that it's super dorky, but he just owns it, which I like. And yes, I made him do a magic trick for me at the bar. He made my $10 bill float. It was so weird!!

We chatted for about an hour and a half and then I had to run off for a party. I had a great time, but ultimately, am I trying to date him? Not really. I'd go out again though, he was really cool and I had a good time. Hopefully I can phase it into the friend zone and then have a cool guy friend I can hang out with in the building. (I know what you're thinking, guys don't take girls out on dates to be friends. We'll see what I can finagle.)

Thanks for your advice friends.

PS He admitted to also googling me, and trying to find me on facebook, so I don't feel guilty, everyone does it.

Questions I've been getting a lot lately:

Purple roses from my sweet visiting teacher. Clearly a terrible photo since I couldn't get the colors looking right. And, sadly, now you know I haven't been given flowers in a very long time because I don't have a vase.

So, between traveling and being unemployed I feel like lately I've been getting a lot of the same questions, especially in comments. I'm not always good about responding to comments, and I feel a little awkward acting as if I'm important enough to have a "FAQ" blog post, but, this is easier than responding to the same things over and over. So here's a few of your questions and answers:

Q-(Regarding my recent trip to London and Paris) Was this your first time to Europe?

A- No. When I was 17 my family took a 10 day trip. We spent a week in Italy (Florence, Rome, and Venice), two days in Germany, and a day in Switzerland. We also drove through Austria and saw a lot of the country just by driving through. I got my first passport for this trip and just recently had to renew to go to Brazil. I look like such a baby in my first passport.

Q-Where's your next big trip going to be?

A-For the first time since I can remember, I have no trips planned. I like to always have something to look forward to, even if it's just a weekend somewhere. :( Being unemployed, I don't think it's the smartest thing to plan a big trip that will cost a lot of money, and don't feel like I can commit to taking vacation days when I should (hopefully) be starting a new job soon. Also, I know it seems like I'm always traveling (and I know, I sort of am) but it's a LOT easier to feel like you can get away when you live on the east coast. The states are so small here, you can be somewhere "away" in just a couple hours. All the weekend trips I took last year (Berkshires, Vermont, New Hampshire, Boston, Rhode Island, DC) are a 5 hour drive at most, sometimes only a 2-3 hours drive. So it's like living in San Diego and going to LA. If you still think I'm spoiled, just know I'm just trying to take advantage of the fact that I'm single and don't have anyone to worry about except myself. If there's one thing I've learned from my friends and family who are married and have kids, it's that I should take advantage of every opportunity I can while I'm single. So I do. :)

Q-What kind of work are you looking for?

A-I'm looking to do the same kind of thing I was doing before, admin/executive assistant work. I want to stay in finance, and am hoping to end up at a smaller company, like a hedge fund, verses a large bank. However, at this point I'm open to a large or small company.

Q-How's the job hunt going?

A-Good! I've got two great headhunters and have learned the finance industry is small. I've had a lot of friends pass my resume around which has been super helpful, and have even run into friends and old coworkers when I've been interviewing. I've had a bunch of first interviews and am in the process of scheduling some second interviews. I know how blessed I was to work for such an amazing boss at my last job, and know I'll never find anyone as great as him, however I want to make sure I'm happy in my new role, wherever that may be. When I moved to New York I didn't have a job, had no income, very little money saved, and a car that I owed money on back in California and hadn't been able to sell yet. I took the first offer I received, and was very fortunate it ended up being such a great job. Now, thankfully, I have the luxury of being a little more picky. I've been interested in most all the companies I've interviewed with, however have interviewed for a couple positions in which I knew I would not be happy. I am thankful for the opportunities I'm having, as it's always good practice to interview, and I'm enjoying seeing what opportunities are out there. I really love one of my headhunters and she's doing a really great job of getting me in front of potential employers.

Q-Have you thought of looking for a job in California?

A-No. New York is my home. I have no desire to leave.

Q-What happened to John? (My boss, whom I adored.) Has he found a job yet?

A-No. There are very few positions on Wall Street for the level he was at. The person who was in his position before him, was let go and was out of work for two years. As much as I would love to work for him again, I'm not holding my breath. This week I found out he's started looking into positions in other cities and countries. He's interviewed for jobs in London and Sydney. I did inform him, even though I'm not trying to leave New York, I would be open to relocating to London or Sydney. :) "Only Down Under, kids, only Down Under" has a nice ring to it, don't you think? Seriously though, he has a family now, and has already worked in London so I really would be surprised if he moved. I'm not holding my breath. (Although his replacement at my last job, my boss for four months, moved his wife and five kids from Paris for the position, so.....you never know!)

Q-How do you spend your free time?

A-I'll be honest, being a lady of leisure is not that bad, not that bad at all. There are the obvious negative aspects. I'm not independently rich, which is why I'm grateful for the interviews I've been going on, and I know my money won't last forever. Also, I love living alone, but now that I'm unemployed I'm alone a lot. If I don't have a lunch date or an interview I have to make sure I get myself out of the apartment. My first few days I'd pack up my laptop and just go hang out at Starbucks, just so I could be around people.

When I'm not interviewing, I'm really enjoying the mornings sleeping in (finally got over the jetlag two weeks later), going to day time movies (when the Oscar noms were announced, I'd already seen 9 of the 10 best pictures), meeting friends for lunch (we're in the middle of Restaurant Week!), and going for jogs or walks in the park. There's always an episode of SVU on, and Netflix streaming has become my best friend. Between the craziness of the holidays and then traveling, I hadn't worked out for about six weeks and my first day back at the gym was for boxing class. It. Was. ROUGH. So I'm trying to get back to the gym as well.

Q-Are you dating anyone? (Okay, this hasn't been any more than usual, but it's everyones favorite question for single people.)

A-Nope.

Last night

Dinner at Balthazar followed by dessert at Rice to Riches. Great night. Thanks Dad.

The beauty of having a private blog...

...is sharing stories like this one:

A few weeks ago I got in the elevator to head to the basement to do laundry. I live on the ninth floor. The elevator stopped on the fifth floor and a guy walked in carrying laundry. He said hi, so I said hi and something like, "Headed to the same place?" From there we started a conversation that didn't stop until he was getting off the elevator. Normally I hate small talk and feel like when I meet a guy for the first time it's usually sort of awkward. There was zero awkwardness and the conversation just flew. I did feel semi-awkward throwing my clothes into the washers in front of him. I mean, I wouldn't ever let anyone do my laundry, let alone some guy I just met see me sorting through my whites, which consist mostly of socks, and colors, which consist mostly of underwear. I made sure to pick washers on the other side of the room.

So we chat chat chat, hop on the elevator, chat chat chat, and then he hops off and we exchange goodbyes and something along the lines of, "Maybe see you in 40 minutes."

Am I interested? Not really. I'll be blunt (hey, my blog's private, I can be ridiculously honest.) He's short. I'm 5'10 1/2" and it wasn't like he was 5'9". I'm guessing 5'8" at best. I've long gotten over the fact that I most likely won't marry someone who's 6'4". In fact, for some reason, every guy I've dated in NY has been my height or a smidgen shorter.

I've tried having this conversation with my girlfriends (who randomly all seem to be short) and, loves....I adore you, but as much as you think you do, you don't get it. I told my friend last night who's 5'4" to imagine going to a party where everyone was under 5'0". She busted up laughing, but, that's how I feel a lot of the time. I'm secure with my height, I really am, and I don't think about it 9 days out of 10. I don't think about it when I'm with my girlfriends, but sometimes I find myself in groups of people, men and women, and everyone is at least 2 or 3 inches shorter than me. I can't help but think, "What the hell? Where are all the tall people??" My short friends get mad when people say they should date the short guys, but.....those people are right. First of all, if short girls aren't willing to date short guys, who are those guys supposed to date? And if they take all the tall guys, who are the tall girls supposed to date? Aaaaaanywaaaaaays, this is clearly something I've discussed several times. (Like with my college roommate who was 5'2" and was embarrassed to say the guy she was dating was kinda short. How short? 5'10". She said she's used to guys being over 6'0". My jaw dropped and I said, "What if I had a rule that I could only date guys who were at least 6'8"???? Do you realize how ridiculous you sound saying you need a guy to be at least eight inches taller than you?" [By the way, they ended up getting married.] I realize it's not exactly the same because there's a lot more guys in the 6'0" height group than the 6'8".)

So, like I said, I've gotten over the fact that I most likely will not marry someone who's a lot taller than me. And, as long as the guy is okay with it, and not a skinny twig, I'm okay with it as well.

Aaaaaaanyways.......

So when I went down to throw my clothes in the dryer I noticed he hadn't come down yet. (He and I were the only ones doing laundry and his machine lid was closed.) I threw my clothes in the dryer and went back upstairs. An hour later I went down to get my clothes out. As I was walking in I noticed my clothes were pulled out and sitting in a cart. My initial thought was that someone had pulled them out because they'd needed the dryer. Then I remembered no one else was doing laundry, and there's like six dryers anyway. As I got inside the room I realized my clothes had been pulled out and put into a cart, which was placed directly in front of the dryer this guy was using (which was like, three dryers down from the one I'd been using.)

Hm...........

Now here's the great part, the load consisted of two long sleeved shirts, a tank top, a pair of flannel pj pants, some socks, and underwear. Like, probably 25 pairs of underwear (I have a bad habit of putting off laundry until I absolutely have to do it.)

I mean......it was like, an 85% underwear load.

So, I gathered my belongings and texted Courtnie, as we'd been texted about this guy earlier. Wtf. Should I be flattered? Freaked? Is this his way of hitting on me? Am I supposed to respond somehow? I'm so confused. In her quick wit Court responded that I should take his laundry and leave a note saying, "#91B." (My apartment number.) I laughed.

But seriously.

I racked my brain trying to think of rational explanations. Maybe he was trying to be nice? But honestly though, everyone sort of knows the rule that you don't touch other people's laundry. AND, even if he DID think it was a friendly gesture, wouldn't he stop as soon as he realized he was touching my panties and quickly put it all back?

I know what you're thinking. Was any underwear missing? Thankfully, I think it was all there (at least the favorites.)

Obviously he's trying to say something, but I just don't know how he expects me to respond.

SO...fast forward to yesterday. I was leaving the building and my doorman tells me he has an envelope for me. I had no clue what it was but figured I'd must have ordered something online and had forgotten. I take the envelope and see written in blue ink, "Rachel, 9th floor." And in black ink, "Hope."

I started getting nervous that maybe one of my neighbors was complaining about me or something. Or, I thought, maybe it was a thank you because I'd just barely given the doormen their holiday tip last week.

So I get to the movies and open it up and find this inside:

I don't even know what to do............any suggestions? And I'm trying to forget about the fact that he went to the doorman and was like, "Hey, there's this chick who lives on the 9th floor, her name's Rachel but I don't know her last name, do you? And can you leave this for her?"

And can someone also please explain how I can meet a guy in five seconds, while probably looking bad (I mean, it was laundry night....I was probably in pjs, slippers, and had my hair in a pony) and yet haven't been asked out by a Mormon in over two years? Seriously. This is a problem.

Part of me wants to positively reinforce the good behavior of taking initiative. Part of me wants to come out and ask what was up with the laundry. Part of me figures maybe I'll get a free meal out of it. (Hey, I'm unemployed and a girl's gotta eat.) Most of me wants to ignore the note all together, but I feel like I can't because what if I run into him again?

Help.

2010: year in review

2010 was quite the year. I didn't really know how to explain it until I read my aunt's facebook status update and she described it as the year of "the good, the bad, and the ugly." That's how I feel. I can't say it was a terrible year, as I got my first very own apartment, traveled, met some new great people, enjoyed good health and a healthy family, and welcomed two new baby nephews into the world. However, I also lost my boss who I adored, then lost my own job, and other various things that definitely fit into the "bad and ugly" category.

That being said......this was my year:

In December 2009:

I wrapped up the year with two of my high school favorites, Megan and Gina. The poor things were born and raised and still live in sunny southern California, and when they came out we had the largest storm since I'd moved to New York. It was insane.

In January:

I spent some quality time with my dad and Brad over Chinese when they had coordinating business trips to the big apple.

In February:

We celebrated my dad's 60th in Boston. I gave him a book I'd put together of photos from his life and letters from his family and friends wishing him a happy birthday and telling some of their favorite memories with him.

Went to see A View from the Bridge starring Scarlett Johansson and Liev Shreiber. I chatted with Liev for a second after and snapped (a very blurry) photo, and then developed a new crush.

Spent Presidents' Weekend (and Valentine's Day) in a house in Vermont with friends.

Spent an evening with Mad.

Invested in a DSLR and Ed took me shooting and taught me a few things.

We had fun playing around with super slow shutter speeds in Grand Central.

In March:
I spent a week in Rio de Janeiro with Jeff and Marcus.

Went hanggliding over Copacabana and told everyone it felt like how I would imagine it feels to fly on an Avatar dragon. It was super fun.

Fell in love with Buzios, where we spent one night.

Began my serious love affair with the Jackie O. Reservoir in Central Park, where I run my blues away.

Walked the red carpet at the TriBeCa Film Festival with Ashley and Kambria. Saw Renee Zellweger, Helena Bonham Carter, and shook Forest Whitaker's hand.

In April:
Took my first trip to DC with Court to visit Jac, and went to the Cherry Blossom Festival.

Acted a fool in front of the capital building.

Loved the tulips.

Really enjoyed seeing the monuments at night.

Went to Dallas to visit friends and family, and couldn't get over the fact that Will and Jess have four kids under the age of four. I can't even imagine!! It wasn't too long ago we were in college and they were just dating.

Walked the Brooklyn Bridge and got ice cream with Melmo and A$, chatted, gossiped, and realized what a small world we live in, when they came to visit the big apple.

Laughed and laughed over Serendipity frozen hot chocolate with Rachel, and spent most of the weekend with the Burns girls during their visit to NYC.

In May:
Gave my mom the surprise of her life when I showed up at 10pm in the house on Mother's Day weekend (but didn't get a single picture with her!) Also surprised Meg at her bridal shower that same weekend.

Gossiped with Gina at Meg's shower.

Enjoyed breakfast with the kids on a sunny Saturday.

Was pressured into going to Duck Beach again, even though I swore I was done going. It ended up being my favorite year.

Went to tons of Yankees games.

In June:
Was spoiled rotten by my boss on my birthday.

And my friends (who know me way too well.)

Blew out the candles with Britt.

Enjoyed being entertained by Jamar, as always.

Reconnected once again with my musketeers, Meg and G, at Meg's rehearsal dinner.

Helped Meg celebrate the most important day of her life.

Went camping in the Catskills.

In July:
Spent the 4th celebrating Nad's birthday in Boston.

Enjoyed having one of my favorite married couples, Becky and Sean, out in New York.

Got down at the Yankees game, on one of the hottest, most humid days of the year.

Learned how to trapeze.

Met a tall drink of water.

In August:
Was a bridesmaid for the eleventh time at Aimee's LA wedding.

Spent a week in California, and then roadtripped to SLC, and then Rexburg, and back. Enjoyed spending time with all my grandparents, especially picking raspberries with my grandpa.

Spent time with Chels on campus at my alma mater in the bookstore.

Ended my two weeks of vacation in San Francisco for a girls' weekend with Chelse and Becky.

Continued my love affair with the reservoir.

Went to a Sadie Hawkins party with Mikey Perkey.

Spent a weekend with 16 friends in the glory that is the Berkshires. It was actually a little chilly that weekend so we cranked the pool up to 90 degrees and pretty much stayed there all weekend.

In September:

Got my very own apartment on the Upper West Side! (Probably the best part of 2010.)

Watched the Yankees from the 12th row.

Enjoyed plenty of rooftop BBQs.

Spent a weekend in Rhode Island with friends.

Had endless shenanigans with Court and Em.

In October:
Spent a girls only weekend in the Berkshires, relaxing, watching baseball, and going to the spa. (And made my very first fire, which you see in the background, which I was very proud of and couldn't stop talking about, despite the help of the Duraflame log.)

Died over the fall foliage.

Loved and hated the fact that I now live on the same block as Magnolia.

Got down with my bad self on Halloween dressed as a baseball player.

Continued to love the reservoir, in spring, summer, and fall.

Set up a Skype account and Skyped with mom.

In November:
Stumbled across the premier of Megamind at the theater on the next block and saw Ben Stiller and Brad Pitt.

Watched the marathon and was able to see so many friends thanks to the Road Runner iPhone app that tracked everyone.

Got super inspired, and cried, several times.

My mom came out for a visit and we enjoyed an unusually warm weekend for November, and loved the still changing leaf colors.

Enjoyed brunch at Norma's.

Loved the view from the Top of the Rock of Central Park and upper Manhattan.

Spent Thanksgiving Day in New Hampshire with almost all my family and couldn't get enough of Hudson and Madeline.

In December:
Met the most popular girl in the blogosphere, Piper Jane.

Went to the Brandon Flowers concert with Emilee.

Continued loving the reservoir through the winter, even though my lungs wanted to go on strike from the painful cold air.

Turned on my oven for the first time (haven't used it since) to do a little holiday baking.

Got my first Christmas tree, which brought me an embarrassing amount of joy, and I named her Tanya (the tannenbaum.)

Went to Annual Bake Day in Dallas. Baked all. day. long. And had so much fun with my mom, aunt, and cousins.

Took a spur of the moment trip to California the day after getting laid off (Dec 13) and couldn't get enough of sweet Huddy Buddy.

Carted my mom all over southern California after her surgery, and had fun stealing her scooter and riding it around the house (until I ran into a wall....)

Cleaned out my closet and bedroom at my dad's request and came across some treasures.

Spent Christmas in New Hampshire.

Came back to a snowed-in big apple.

Felt pretty good about my ornament collection (mostly travel, still have a few to get.)

Top to bottom, left to right: San Francisco, Australia, Maine, gift from Meg, Brazil, Yankees World Series, San Antonio, Lake Placid, and Texas.

After being gone for two weeks after getting laid off, came home to a box of my belongings that were shipped to me. Sort of depressing. I was happy to also come home to a bunch of holiday cards. Thank you!!

Counted down the last seconds of 2010 in London.

I can't say I was sad to see 2010 end. Looking forward to 2011 and all it has to offer.