Today I was at the eye doctor for two and a half hours. Two and a half hooooours. Bleh. Then I went to check out and found out my insurance doesn't cover ANY of the cost of contacts and to get a year's supply it's going to cost me $350. Awesome.
Then I left and walked to the 6. While I was walking I was thinking, "This is one of those nights that's just miserable and I don't love it here." So dang cold, wishing I had gloves on, rainy and windy, wishing I was in boots because my feet were freezing in their flats with no socks. I was trying to dodge puddles, all while squinting because my vision wasn't totally back to normal from the drops the doctor put in.
I only made it half way through Park Avenue (to an island in the middle of the street) before the line turned green and as I was standing there I got the old car drives by and splashes freezing water up on me. Awesome. I stood there thinking, "Is there anything more pathetic?"
I finally made it to the 6, only to see a bunch of people waiting on the platform. Usually this is a good sign because it means a train hasn't come for a while, and one should be coming soon. Usually.
I stood there while four uptown 6 trains came and left. (Not to mention, I had nothing to read because I'd finished my book at the doctors, and randomly didn't have a magazine with me.) After a downtown 6 came without stopping and then a fifth uptown train came and went I decided to brave the weather and schlep the 8 blocks down to Grand Central to catch the 4/5.
I went through the turnstile only to find out where I was trying to exit was closed. So now I had to pay to get back into the subway. I swiped my card, but it wouldn't work because it hadn't been 18 minutes since the last swipe (it had been like 15.)
As I dug for my wallet what pulled up? A downtown 6 train. I honestly considered just hopping over the turnstile.
The good news is I paid so dang quick for my single use ticket and made it on that stupid train.
New York, I love you, but I don't always like you.
I read this post the other day and literally cracked up to myself, out loud, at work. I obviously could relate. It's a pretty lengthy post, but it's worth your time if you're LDS and over the age of "normal" for being single, or used to be single at that age, or know someone who's single at that age.
When the blog author rattles off the list of all the things she's sick of doing because she's single I kept thinking, "Yep, yep yep." And I also could relate when she talked about how she's grateful for the opportunities she has because of her single status. I really have tried to focus in the last year or two on the things I have control over, and not so much on the things I don't.
All I ever hear is that I need to "do those things" while I'm single, so, I'm trying to do them. Just today while I was rehashing my fun trip to Rhode Island to my brother he mentioned that he wished he would have had more time and money for more trips while he was in college. I also wish I would have had more time and money for more trips in college. I realize more than ever that life after college, if you're single, is the time to really enjoy the gift that is a little more....free? I don't know the right word.
Anyway, while there are some great benefits to being single, there are the days I'm sort of over it.
My absolute favorite part of this post was the discussion the author had with her relative "Ruth." I died. I wish I had $5 for every awkward conversation at a wedding reception, funeral, holiday, run-in with an old member of the ward at Target back home, etc. It's not as awkward for me as it used to, maybe that's because I've had about eight years of practice at this point. I can honestly say these questions don't really make me feel bad about myself, as they once did, however not everyone is at that point. I've had many many many many many many many conversations with single girls who've mentioned how they hate going to any sort of get together where they'll run into people from their past and be asked the inevitable dating/marriage questions. I haven't gotten the blatant, "Why aren't you married?" question lately, but trust me friends, it's asked. Frequently. And if you even knew what sort of answers we dream of giving back you'd probably be offended, which is why we try to keep them to ourselves.
I often find myself wondering, if there are so many girls (and guys, I'm assuming) being asked this question, how has the memo not made its way back to those asking? For the twelve of you who read this blog, in case you don't know, allow me to fill you in. Single people typically hate being asked, or told, the following:
"When are you getting married?"
"How have you not gotten engaged?"
"Why have you and (insert significant other's name here) been dating for so long?"
The nudging at wedding receptions to go catch the bouquet because we're, ya know, single! Listen, we don't feel like awkwardly standing in a group of behives, trying to catch a freaking bouquet. Don't be that jerk at the table who insists. Seriously.
"You are too picky." (Seriously? How do you even know how picky I am? And do you really think I can just erase the years I was taught not to settle?)
"Are you dating anyone?"
Yes, even that last question is typically deplored. I know, I know, ya just wanna know!! But listen, there are other ways to find out if someone's been going on dates with anyone exclusively. It's not that difficult, or blatant. Haven't you ever noticed the awkwardness that is suddenly felt when you ask, and the answer is, "No"? It's usually followed by two seconds of silence because you were probably prepared with a list of five questions about that special someone, but you were thrown off and now there's nothing to say. Something is then mumbled, usually along the lines of, "Well, good for you! Way to be independent." or "Oh, you've got so much time!" or "The boys are probably so intimidated!" or "There's plenty of time for settling down" or "plenty of fish in the sea." Blah blah blah blah. Yes, we know. And that whole "boys are intimidated" thing? You're not convincing us because we can rattle of lists of beautiful, confident, smart, worthy, successful women who are not only married, but dated a ton. Somehow the men weren't intimidated of them.
The fact of the matter is, you're trying to make us feel better, but you don't need to. We already know we're great, and when the right time comes it will happen. But the fact that you feel a need to make us feel better, makes us feel, well, not so great. (For those of you reading this in Utah and Idaho, I hate to say it, but you're the worst offenders. Lay off, will ya?)
And it must be said, but this goes for questions about babies to the marrieds as well. From what I hear it's pretty annoying being asked when someone is planning on having babies. Peeps! This is a private thing discussed between a husband and wifey! Leave em alone! You'll know when they're planning to have a family when they announce the pregnancy! Just like you'll know I'm engaged when you receive my invitation (if you haven't offended me to the point of not being invited.) Kidding. Mostly.
Alright, have I said too much? Probably. But hey, now at least you know. Spread the word. You're welcome.
You know when people say something totally rude, and it sort of puts you in a bad mood and ruins part of your day? That's about how I'm feeling today. I got to work early, had a decent day, was having a pretty good wardrobe, hair, and makeup day, and basically feeling pretty good. I was anxiously looking forward to the end of the day because that means three day weekend, but things were going well. Then at about 3:45 rude coworker has to go and say the snottiest thing, loud enough for anyone within a ten foot radius to hear, implying my level of work ethic is SO below hers. I went from zero to furious in about 2 seconds. I honestly almost threw the *f-bomb at her. I was totally annoyed the next hour until I could get out of the office. (I don't typically leave before 5, but considering it's a long weekend and usually we get out at 2 before long weekends, everyone was leaving early.)
Finally I left the office and tried to just forget it and came home. I was just decompressing and getting excited about my trip to Rhode Island tomorrow with friends when I get a phone call from a random number I don't recognize. I answered and it's some dude starting to talk to me about the government grant I supposedly signed up for on some website. I was very confused and was about to tell him it was a mistake, but then decided to let him go on, to see how it played out. I honestly let him speak probably another 10 seconds before I finally said to him something along the lines of, "You know what I'm actually really confused what you're talking about and think there's some sort of mistake. Can you please take me off your calling list?" This dude copped me major attitude and starts telling me how I should have said that sooner. Before I can even respond he hung up on me!! Ugh. So annoyed.
Now after typing this all out (and venting to my roommate) I actually feel a little better. Maybe that caller guy just had his coworker say something really rude to him before he called me. Caller, I forgive you.
Alright.....letting it go. Looking forward to the trip this weekend, looking forward to relaxing, looking forward to getting behind the wheel and having the freedom of driving, looking forward to s'mores, looking forward to laughing, looking forward to making new friends and becoming closer with older friends.
I feel better. Thanks.
*I never have, nor would I ever (hopefully) throw the f-bomb at someone.
As usual, I had the best time in Boston. I splurged on a rental car and had an awesome drive up and back. I barely had a voice by the time I got to Bean Town because I'd been blaring the radio and singing my little heart out pretty much the whole way. Gosh I miss driving sometimes.
Mad loves to get into my bag whenever I go, and thought my pashmina made a great blanket.
We ended up emptying out my bag and I put her in, and picked up the bag and gave her a little ride.
Lastly, it is unreal how much she's changed in the three(!) months since I've last seen her. (Note to self, never go that long again without Mad time.) She is talking like crazy, walking everywhere, and continuing to melt my heart. One thing in particular she did over and over all weekend was pretend to sneeze. I thought it was so hysterical and had to get it on video (yes, I know everything is always a million times better when the child is your own, or you're the aunty, but I think the west coast grandparents will get a little kick, not to mention, no one can deny the cuteness of those cheeks and those curls!) Of course as soon as I get the camera out she quit doing it so I had to prompt her, but just imagine her doing this little sneeze randomly all the time, including when she was laying in Mommy and Daddy's bed, drinking a bottle after her nap. She'd just randomly sneeze. So cute! Sometimes she'd lean her head back so far she'd lose her balance a little bit. I miss you already Madeline!!